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Privileged Rundown: Episode 17, "All About Betrayal"

BuzzSugar — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 11:31:07 PST

Wow, this week's Privileged has a lot of fallout from last week's big confessions. We finally learn Sage's big secret, and Rose starts to realize that all her life people have kept secrets from her in an effort to protect her. She no longer wants to be protected, though, and it's interesting how much more grown-up Rose seems by the end of this episode. Meanwhile, Megan and Will are fighting about career issues and Marco longs to get back together with Keith.

Did you watch this second-to-last episode of Privileged? To talk about it,

So Sage's big confession is out, and no, it doesn't turn out that she somehow murdered her parents or anything like that. But she does believe she caused their deaths by whining and crying so much (about not being able to go to a birthday party with a petting zoo!) that they missed their plane, instead boarding the one that crashed and killed them. Obviously, a lot of other people had a hand in that accident, but I can understand why Sage feels responsible.
Rose's reaction to the confession's super-interesting to me: She's mad, but she's not mad about what Sage did when they were 6 years old. Instead, she's mad that Sage protected her from that - and who knows what else? - over the years. It's a little sad to see her packing up her suitcase at the end of the episode, but she's not going far, just down the hall. There are lots of reasons why I want this show to get a second season, but one is definitely that I want to see how Rose acts when she's less under Sage's wing.
Robert Buckley is hot, but as the magazine editor, he's also kind of a jerk. He gives Megan a hard time with all of her pitches while making Will photo editor (at his dad's request), then tells Megan he can't deal with having a conflict of interest down the line with his employees dating.

I find it a little disorienting to see Megan so flustered by David. Not that she should be sassy with him, but it's startling to see someone (other than Laurel) shoot her down and talk down to her - and to watch her just take it. I like it more when Megan's all bubbly and overtalk-y. The addition of David is throwing me for a loop.
But the part that got a real reaction from me in this episode was Will's behavior! My gosh, he's so unfair to Megan, jumping down her throat when she says she doesn't want his dad to get her a job. Projection much, Will? Sheesh.
Is this curtains for Will and Megan? I can't remember the last episode that went by without them fighting, and the magazine issue pokes at one of their central conflicts: Megan wants to earn everything, and Will's more or less OK with using his wealth and contacts to his advantage. Not to be a Negative Nancy or anything, but I kind of hope they do break up - or at least take a little breather.
In other love story news: Marco proposes! "Platinum doesn't lie"!
Overall, I'm glad that they're using Marco more and more - and not just for a punny quip here and there. His storyline is actually moving forward and I like it.
Since Keith turned Marco down the first time, does that mean Megan got to eat the turtles?

Photos courtesy of the CW

Privileged Rundown: Episode 16, "All About Confessions"

BuzzSugar — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 10:30:41 PST

This week's episode of Privileged really is all about confessions! Big reveal-y ones, too, from Charlie to Megan, from Rose to Zach (and Zach to Rose!), from a strange blond woman to Rose, and from Sage to a Catholic priest. Lots going on this week in lush Palm Beach - and none of it has to do with Megan's family. Are you glad to get a reprieve from her family drama? Or did they just replace one kind of drama with another?

If you want to talk about this week's episode (spoilers ahead!),

Last things first: Just as actress Ashley Newbrough promised, Sage reveals a big secret at the end of the episode - that she feels like she caused her parents' deaths. Yikes! I'm anxious to find out what she means by this.
One of my favorite lines of the episode also comes from Sage as she nervously walks to church with Luis: "It's been a long time since God's seen me. I mean, should I change my outfit?"
Rose's storyline went from sweetly adorable to mega-drama right quick. I love that Zach is touched by Rose stalking his ex-girlfriend (who, to Rose, seems "really lovely"), and that Rose then wants to hurry home so she can watch Battlestar Galactica while talking to him on the phone. But then that blond lady approaches Rose and reveals that Miles is her grandfather. The big drama seems like it's coming next week: Rose getting on a plane, all serious-like, with Sage pleading with her not to leave "like this."
But before the drama kicks in, how cute is it that Zach met his ex at space camp? I also loved Rose saying that she expected her sexual experience would "bend the whole gender-power dynamic" and then confessing that Megan had made her read Backlash.
I couldn't be more grateful for the lack of Lily problems in this episode. I just have such a hard time with that character sometimes. But this week she was practically likable. And I got a kick out of Charlie's line: "So I meant to ask you: How was jail?"
Could've used a lot more Marco, though the image of him wearing um, just a bow, and singing "Would You Light My Candle?" from Rent definitely cracked me up. A dash of Marco in the episode is always better than no Marco at all.
It felt to me like the Charlie-Megan kiss was way rushed, but I guess it was going to have to happen sometime, and it's still up in the air whether or not Privileged will get a second season so might as well speed up the action. I guess?
Will's behavior in this episode infuriated me. What did you make of all of that? The macho posturing that both men exhibit at the bar is just ridiculous. I get that Will feels like he plays second fiddle to Charlie, but the whole beer pong thing is so unnecessary. Then again, I can't believe I'm making an impassioned point about beer pong.
Also, where do you fall on Mandy's statement about Megan? "You play all sweet and adorable, but the truth is, you're completely selfish." I'm generally inclined to take Megan's side over Mandy's, and I don't think Megan intentionally caused anyone harm, but I do think she can be naive.
It's refreshing - though bittersweet - to see Megan and Charlie finally have a frank discussion about their feelings and the nature of their friendship. It seems so real and honest when Megan tells Charlie that he's the most important person in her life because that really has always seemed to be the case. She's not just saying it to make him feel better.
Man, I'm going to miss Charlie.

Privileged Rundown: Episode 15, "All About the Big Picture"

BuzzSugar — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 09:37:24 PST

Soooo much family drama in this week's episode of Privileged. Too much family drama? Hmm. There is also some fun Marco stuff (having to do with his dream to open up his own place!) and the twins grapple with the old conundrum: Fame or boys?

Did you watch Privileged this week? To see some of my thoughts on this episode and chat about it all,

There's a lot of interesting stuff in this episode, like Will and Megan fighting over Will's role in the whole Lily/mom debacle and Lily and Megan's minor reconciliation. But I'm not watching the show to find out whether Megan's dad starts drinking again. Is that bad to say?
"You're a billionaire! Isn't there a special hotline for you guys?" Also love Megan's response to Will's cheesy crack about what said hotline would be ("1-800-IM-RICH?"): "That's not enough numbers!"
Rose's relationship with Zach is still adorable, even if it's baffling her friends. "You're dating a mathlete! And you won't even make fun of him!"
Sage's continued giddiness over her new relationship with Luis is also pretty cute. And for some cheesy reason, I find it endearing that the young chef falls in love with a girl named Sage because, you know, Quiche Sage actually makes sense no matter how you mean it.
Marco's stress-organizing post-breakup. Megan wants him to channel his energy into other things, like changing his hair. His response: "I'm not 16, or a girl, or white."
Will's mom cooks?

I love that Pete Wentz shows up and then gets totally overshadowed by gross Max. Max first acts all squicky and intimate with Rose, then Sage tells him that Hugh Hefner wants his nasty plaid jacket back.
Ack, Lily is just nothing but trouble. She raises hell over not knowing her mom was in town, then about her mom skipping town, and then she has to go and kiss Will! I have such a hard time sympathizing with her. At all.
Even the heartwarming scene between Megan and Lily toward the end did very little for me. I think I'm getting sick of Megan feeling responsible all the time and apologizing and Lily never feeling responsible or apologizing.
Oh, so much drama with Marco's restaurant! Obviously I don't want him to leave the show, but I was so happy for him when he thought he was going to be moving on and opening his own place. And I absolutely loved the part with Marco and Megan squealing and jumping up and down over the news that Laurel is giving him the money.
Dear CelebStyle, please find me that dress that makes Megan look "respectably hot-cute," 'k? Thanks.
Wait, after Megan leaves Will's place for dinner, does she not go back to her dad's like she said she would? Or did that just get cut? It was bizarre to see her go from that emotional scene to a happy, chipper moment with the twins.
Apparently the Baker twins' big moment as celebutantes has passed. It's kind of funny to see them so wiped out from nights of nonstop parties. Also funny? Rose's ho-hum line as she's putting on jewelry: "OK. I'm ready to help cure cancer."
"Driver Dave" will probably never stop being a funny name to me.
Coincidentally, I also wanted the Reality Bites Ethan Hawke to marry me.
Ha! Megan says Miley Cyrus already looks older than she does.
Aaaaaack! Will loves Megan! And Megan loves Will, but he still said it first!

Photos courtesy of The CW

Privileged Rundown: Episode 14, "All About Tough Love"

BuzzSugar — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 09:43:43 PST

Holy drama, Privileged fans! Last week's episode was all synchronized swimmers and sex in hospital supply rooms. Now in this episode we've got jail visits and arguments about posting bail and agonizing thoughts on what sisterhood truly means - and that surprising and totally sad ending! Well, we also got some shirtless Will and snarky Marco, so it's not all high drama. There's also the Luis-Sage romance that continues to be adorably entertaining.

Did you catch this episode? To see some of my favorite moments and to share your own,

I love jaded Marco in this episode, always supplying the droll comedic relief. "Young love," he scoffs at Luis and Sage. "Makes me sick." Later he sums up why their young romance won't last: "One of them will choose MySpace, the other one will choose Facebook and they'll never speak again."
So, Lily's in jail for drug possession, though she says she "didn't do it." Will offers to pay the $25,000 bail but Megan tells him not to, and Megan's dad decides that nobody should post Lily's bail. This is a tough one for Megan who's having trouble just leaving her sister in jail. I could see their dad's point about Lily needing to hit rock bottom, but it did seem a little harsh to leave her there. What do you think about this storyline?
Sage and Rose's classmate says that Sage is dating "a domestic!" Wow. My favorite part of the school scenes, however, is the dig they get in at the CW's new 90210 when Sage says the rich/poor love story is so lame "they did it on the first 90210."
Oh, gratuitously shirtless Will? Why, thank you. Don't mind if I do.
I love dorky little Zach (with a "chah," not a "kah")! When he delivers a poem to Rose (because, as he overheard Rose saying, "it's a nice way to show someone you care about them"), she thinks he wrote it and he doesn't correct her. Problem is, Rose can't understand the poem! I love that she goes to "WordyWord.com" to look up the words she doesn't know so she can figure out "Zach's crazy hard poem about our sublimary love!"
Charlie's super down on the whole Luis-Sage thing, thinking that it will lead to Luis getting fired. But Luis says you "always gotta follow your heart."
For some reason, I always forget that Megan is older than Lily. She feels sympathetic toward Lily, thinking about how alone she was growing up. I sort of love the moments when Megan sees the kind of sisterly relationship in Rose and Sage that she wishes she had with Lily. "If Rose was a serial killer, Sage would stay in jail just to braid her hair."
Marco tells Rose that Zach's poem was actually written by John Donne, and then tells her to go find Zach because "no one tries to pull a fast one on my Rose Baker." Also, what is that delicious-looking berries-and-cream parfait thingy Marco is preparing in this scene? Between the shirtless Will and the desserts, this show is like my TV soul mate.
I love how much Luis has gotten to Sage. It's like she doesn't know what to do with all the feelings. She buys him the knives he's been saving up for and he's a little sad because he wanted to earn them for himself. At first Sage freaks out (she yells "Blah, blah, blah!" at him!), but after chatting with Megan she tries to see Luis's side of things. "I get your knife dream. We're not so different. End of fight." Awww!
Also: Sage actually allowed Megan to give her advice! That's new. And really sweet.
Meanwhile, Rose confronts Zach about the poem because lying is something you do in week two of a relationship, "when things get really hard!" Zach tells her she's smarter than she thinks and Rose says that as far as nerds go, he's "even cooler than Michael Cera."
Wow. Megan's mother asks Will to help her post the bail for Lily but then she just takes his money and runs. I feel sorry for Megan in this episode but I feel almost as badly for Will. He's trying so hard to do the right things for her, and it's a complicated situation with a family he's just now getting to know.

What did you think of this week's episode of Privileged?

Privileged Rundown: Episode 13, "All About What Lies Beneath"

BuzzSugar — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 09:35:51 PST

Save the Cuban children with synchronized swimming! This week's episode of Privileged has Rose planning a luncheon to benefit Cuban children - all as a ploy for Sage to spend more time with Luis who is planning the menu. Meanwhile, Megan's wondering why Will doesn't seem to want to get it on with her and her mother shares some unsolicited opinions on the subject. And we meet Marco's man, Keith, who is excited to kick start Marco's future - away from the Baker household.

Did you watch? Want to chat about it? Just

Wow, new credits! I particularly like the shot of Megan guzzling wine/champagne straight from the bottle.
It's official: I'm easily amused. That line from Luis about Megan wanting to "free Willie" made me laugh.
The development of Megan and Marco's relationship is one of my favorite parts of the show at this point. Love her oversharing her romantic issues ("This bra? See-through.") and his response: "Compared to his usual dates, you're a Disney classic."
Speaking of romantic foibles, I usually find Megan's kind of cute, but sliding off the bed and ending up in the hospital was a little . . . much. I did crack up at their "shtupping" session in the supply closet, though - the Grey's Anatomy docs would be proud.
We meet Marco's boyfriend in the same episode that they break up? No fair! It's interesting to see some of Marco's life outside the house - that he aspires to open a cafe, etc. - and it does make me wonder what really keeps him with Laurel and the girls.

Ha, "Love smoothies come later."
I love Charlie, and I am in denial about the fact that he's leaving the show. But the silver lining is that no Charlie means no Mandy, and it just feels like they've done all they're going to do with that plotline. Also, this episode did drive home the fact that Mandy's nuts. I understand her jealousy, but she just seems so crazy when she talks about it.
It's fun to see Rose get a chance to shine, especially with something that took research and a certain amount of craftiness. She clearly is smart, just not school-smart, and sometimes her naivete can actually work in her favor ("Did you know that everyone in this town hates each other?" "Yeah, it's Palm Beach, not the midwest"). In general it's fun to see the twins bail each other out, like when Sage took over for Rose on the red carpet when chatting with Perez Hilton in a previous episode.
On a Palm Beach-related note: The Palm Beach Synchronized Swimmers telling the water-based journey of Cuban refugees to the USA? Ohhhhhhh my, no. So wrong and yet, so hilarious.
And as always, I loved the fashion in this episode, especially that dress that Megan's mother gets her and the totally adorable little red number Rose wears when Mrs. Bennington comes over. Want it!
I was relieved to see Megan yell at her mom and get out some of her deep-seated anger. I'm glad they admitted that this relationship couldn't be just sunshine and fun as soon as Shelby returns to town and decides to be a girlfriend-y kind of mom. That scene felt more realistic than some of their mother-daughter scenes in other episodes and I was glad to see it.
Aw, Sage's accidental love confession: "No, idiot, it's because I liked you. Shut up, I don't like you."

After seeing the previews for next week's episode, I can't wait for that Megan-Marco exchange about the Luis-Sage romance. You?

Photos courtesy of The CW

Privileged Rundown: Episode 12, "All About the Ripple Effect"

BuzzSugar — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 15:16:18 PST

On this week's Privileged, Megan's family situation gets a little more complicated when her mom swings into town for the first time in, oh, 17 years. That dredges up a whole host of other issues, including some conflict between Will and Charlie. Meanwhile, the twins are cute and flirty and provide some levity in an otherwise pretty heavy episode. To see some of my thoughts and add your own, just

First of all, it must be said: not my favorite episode of Privileged. There was just so much going on, and a lot of it was unexplained, especially about Megan's mom's behavior. Why didn't she insist on apologizing for being absent for 3/4 of Megan's life? Why does Megan's dad feel so strongly about her forgiving Shelby when it's not like the two of them had a wonderful marriage? It kind of made my head spin.
That said, it does really shake up Megan's little independent bubble when she has to deal with her family. She knows what she wants most of the time in her career, and at least some of the time in her love life, but around her family, she's a total mess.
The owner of the salon where Lily works makes me laugh so much, first saying "aw, look at you, three steps behind" when telling Megan that Lily got married, then describing Lily's wedding hairstyle as: "I gave her a bouffant. Lawd, it wasn't teased - it was terrified."
Also? So wanted to see those photos of the bouffant.
While Megan's waist-deep in family drama, Sage is still torture-flirting with Luis (and occasionally causing him to shout loudly in Spanish), so Rose decides to take matters into her own hands and seduce him to make Sage jealous and get her to admit her crush. She's adorable when she gets all rhapsodic over a pot of boiling water.

Sage retaliates by inviting over Rose's little crush, a chemistry nerd who plays the French horn and is apparently really into The Notebook (Sage: "OK, maybe don't share that with everyone"). I have to say I'm a little muddled on why Sage did this whole thing with Zachary. To distract Rose from her little plan to make Sage jealous? Too much scheming! Can't keep track!
I love that the reference Will gives for his dad's new magazine is George, the political insider magazine started by JFK Jr. "Hey, remember this moderately successful and totally niche-y magazine from the late '90s?" I wonder how many people reacted a la Rose and "I Will Survive": "I don't know what that means!"
Also, what did Megan do in that interview with the tobacco heiress that was so offensive?
So Megan flips out at her mom - "you gave up the right to call either one of us 'daughter' when you walked out" - and I dunno, but I guess I wanted to see more of that. More explosions, less shopping?
Meanwhile, Will's annoyed because he doesn't understand Megan's family and Megan isn't doing anything to make him get it. So Charlie steps in, and that leads to this whole bitter battle between the two of them, which includes Charlie dressing down Will this way: "You probably didn't even think it, cause you're kind of cocky, but you do have a problem. It's you." Yikes. Did you side with one guy more than the other in this scene?
And what about Mandy? Do you think you'd be jealous (or have you been) if your boyfriend were friends with a girl the way that Charlie is friends with Megan?
The conversation between Sage and Rose at the end made me smile. "Being adorable comes easy for you. It's a gift, Rose. Cherish it."

So, Shelby's sticking around, Ripple magazine may be a go, and Sage totally likes Luis. What did you all think of this one?

Photos courtesy of The CW

Privileged Rundown: Episode 11, "All About Love, Actually"

BuzzSugar — Tue, 02 Dec 2008 13:41:49 PST

Well, the title doesn't lie: This episode of Privileged is indeed all about love (actually) - and specifically, the trials and tribulations of dating long-distance. Laurel goes off to meet Miles, Megan and Will talk about the whole Brazil issue, and Charlie and Mandy have to decide whether they're really going to live together. But that's not all - there's a little something-something between Sage and Marco's new kitchen helper, Luis, too. There's really no limit to what a good cassoulet can do. If you missed this episode, it repeats tonight at its regular time, but if you're ready to talk about it now,

So Megan makes off with the cheat purse, no problem, and then informs Rose that she's grounded. Because it's Megan, it's "The X-Games of grounding," with Rose indefinitely confined to "these four - make that six to eight - walls." Heh.
Also, just so we're clear, here's what grounding means to a girl like Rose: "No phone, no internet, no Pilates." I love that she tries to make nice with Megan by handing over some of her favorite things, including her laptop and her new crystal headband.
Rose is also furious at Sage for telling Megan about the cheating, so they're not speaking for most of the episode.This frees up Sage to spend plenty of time in the kitchen torturing/flirting with Luis, who's also Charlie's cousin. You know, this show has enough complicated family trees, it could put the Walkers to shame.
Meanwhile, Will initially tells Megan he wants to "pause" their relationship while he's in Brazil, then kind of backs down, and then it doesn't matter anyway because he's not going to Brazil.
Wallow Hollow! OMG, what a great idea. Will's has sushi, Japanese beer, and Monty Python movies. What's in your Wallow Hollow?

But all is less well once Megan finds out that Will knew about the job before he even asked Megan out! I loved her bonding with Rose over this later (after Rose is no longer "grounded from banter"), because Rose confirms that Will's actions constitute a "bogus ask."
Speaking of bogus asks - oh, the saga of Charlie and Mandy moving in together. Do you agree with Megan that Mandy was trying to get Charlie to say they were doing the right thing? Or do you agree with Mandy's opinion that Megan's basically nuts? Also, while we're at it, how do you feel about Mandy generally? I was actually a little relieved that she was going to be moving an hour away . . . until they resolve all their issues and move in anyway.
Also moving awfully fast, until it suddenly goes nowhere: Miles and Laurel. Miles takes the news of being a father surprisingly well (by which I mean, there's no reaction, really), but then Laurel's too busy to make time for him and they're never going to date long-distance, and blah blah blah, that's pretty much over. If Miles had been more conniving, I'd expect he'd show up in the girls' lives in some evil way down the line.
You know what deserves its own bullet point? Bedazzled jeans.
On that note: Want the clothes. Again.
Rose's grades come in, and they're pretty decent - a couple of C's, some B's, an A-minus. Megan agrees to ease up on the pressure if Rose won't lie and cheat.
There's no arguing that Will doesn't know how to do a dramatic gesture. First, porch sneaking; now, chestnuts and Christmas tree! Still . . . Megan's pretty quick to forgive, no?

So: Are you feeling sparks between Sage and Luis? What secrets do you think Sage keeps from Rose? Have you had a "I would love to not be in these jeans right now" moment?

Photos courtesy of The CW

Privileged Rundown: Episode 10, "All About Overcompensating"

BuzzSugar — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 14:30:28 PST

Alright, Buzz readers, you win. By popular demand (and, well, because I freaking love this show, too), I'm kicking off my rundowns of Privileged today! Prove your dedication to this sweet CW show by really chatting it up in the comments, OK?

So, on this week's show, things are heating up between Megan and Will, but the two of them don't seem to have an easy path ahead. Also, there's a scheming, bad-girl Baker twin in the house, and for once, it's not Sage. To chat about this episode, just

First of all, I love Megan practicing her saucy "Heyyyyyy, Will!" faces in the mirror, only to greet him with a less-attractive expression that's about halfway to a scowl. She's a smooth operator, that one.
Speaking of smooth - Megan attempting to get herself some hot dates is hysterical, especially when it involves a pre-8 a.m. phone call to Charlie. Not awkward at all.
You just know that someone in the Privileged writers' room once dated a guy whose outgoing voicemail message ended with "Rock om." Cause that? Is something you just can't make up.
On the topic of voicemail, have you ever noticed how many BlackBerries there are in this show? Once I noticed a few of them, they seemed to be everywhere.
OK, a man sneaks onto your patio, all catburglar-like: Adorable or creepy?
Is it me, or does Charlie look not altogether happy when he hugs Mandy after asking her to move in with him?
So, Rose gets a D on that English test and doesn't seem on her way to acing the history exam, either. You know, one of the things I really love about this show is that they've created a character who struggles with school even though she wants to do better. Usually, shows just have the smart slacker, Sage-style.
Well, hi there, bad girl Rose! Buying a test is not too shabby for a brief foray into scheming (except for, you know, that whole ethical line-crossing and potential expulsion). Of course, Sage has been badder for longer, so she goes the extra mile and gets the answers sewn into a purse for Rose. I guess that would work, if the questions are in the exact same order and nobody wonders why somebody fashionable now has an alphabet soup handbag?
I love that Rose takes a moment the night before to match her shoes and her necklace to the "cheat bag." It's so endearing because of course Rose would do that!
Speaking of fashion - Megan's clothes! So adorable! I'd show you pictures of all the things I want (that red dress from the date and the yellow silk top, for starters) if the CW had bothered to take pictures of this episode, but since they didn't, I'll settle for ogling this purple dress from the opening scene.

Did you watch this week's episode? Do you think Megan and Will are right for each other? How sucky is it that we have to wait two weeks for the next episode?

True Blood Bites: Season Four Premiere, "She's Not There"

Shannon Vestal — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 07:53:40 PDT

True Blood is back! Season four returns with Sookie exploring her true lineage, but something is rotten in fairyland. For all the blood and sex that we've come to expect from this show, the premiere is surprisingly tame. But with an unexpected time lapse, there's still a lot to wrap your head around.

As un-bloody as this episode is, I'm still so psyched that True Blood has returned. Let's herald its Summer resurrection by recapping what happened this week when you

Most Misleading Magical Realm: The episode opens with Sookie in a beautiful, oddly-lit fairyland after she had taken Claudine's (her godmother) hand in the third season finale. Everything is pretty and idyllic - especially when Sookie spies her long-lost grandfather Earl. But when Sookie gets wise that the delicious fruit everyone is feasting on is a trap, she essentially starts a riot against Queen Mab, exposing the realm for what it is: a dark, dangerous, scary place. Claudine's brother manages to get Sookie and Earl back on earth, escaping Mab and her intent to harvest humans.

Most Surprising Time Jump: Unlike True Blood's previous season premieres, in which we pick up right after the finale, season four jumps forward. It's because Sookie has been in fairyland, and fairyland does not have time rules. What she thought was a few minutes was actually about a year. Cue Sookie arriving back at home to find her house sold, Jason a cop, and everyone else in town having moved on.

Most Changed Character: Tara has evolved the most in a year; she's got a new job as a cage fighter (so Ryan from The O.C.'s latter days), she's now in a serious relationship with another woman (fellow cage fighter Naomi), and she's going by "Toni." Even though she has relocated to New Orleans, her new life can't keep her away from her hometown when she finds out that Sookie is back.

Most Devoted Display of Commitment: Lafayette supports his boyfriend Jesus by attending his weird coven meetings. Jesus wants Lafayette to embrace his gifts; Lafayette would rather look cool with his new Mr. T haircut. Leading the group is Marnie, who seems to sense that Lafayette is special. In a coven breakthrough, it's Lafayette's presence that brings Marnie's deceased bird back from the dead.

Shortest Honeymoon Period: Jessica and Hoyt have been living together for a year, but they're already on the rocks. Not one for domesticity, Jessica doesn't cook for her man, and her man is getting tired of being her feast. They have an egg-tastic fight, but then make up over (bloody) drinks at Fangtasia, where Jessica flirts with another human guy, but resists going any further.

Least Evident New Parent Glow: Terry and Arlene now have a healthy, smart baby boy - who might just have the devil in him. Rene's progeny clearly worries Arlene more than Terry; when Arlene catches her tot tearing the heads of Barbie dolls, she gives him a talking to about how killing people is not cool. Hopefully that baby's not his father's son - for Arlene's fragile sanity, at least.

Most Drunken Support Group: Sam deals with the fallout of shooting Tommy with a new group - a shapeshifter group. They share, they drink, they shift together. One of the group members also catches Sam's eye: a beautiful shifter/teacher named Luna.

Most Ungracious Act: Jason has really become quite responsible; not only is he a big Bon Temps cop, he kept his promise to Crystal to look after the people of Hotshot. But when he brings a fresh supply of food to the townspeople, they betray him and toss him in an icebox.

Weirdest New Relationship: Tommy is alive! But, evidently, Sam did shoot him in the leg, and he's now paying for Tommy's physical therapy and attending anger management classes. But the oddest thing is Tommy's new attitude and arrangement; he's escorted by Maxine, Hoyt's mother; is he a surrogate for Hoyt now that he has abandoned his momma?

Most Surprising Monarch: Well, I guess we know who won the fight between Bill and the vampire queen. Bill shows up as a charismatic politician and also - in the episode's final reveal - Louisiana's vampire king. We find out because we see that one of the members of Lafayette and Jesus's new coven is reporting back to him about the witches' activity.

Best Real Estate Development: When Sookie comes back from fairyland, she has a rude homecoming: her house has been sold. The mystery buyer is some big corporation, Jason surmises, and they've made a lot of renovations on Gran's house. Sookie wants to see if they can give the buyer their money back, but the buyer is not really the best negotiator: it's Eric, and he has purchased the house so that he can always come in. Oh, and he'd like to have the same privileges with Sookie, he implies as he bares his fangs and the episode ends.

So how did you feel about the premiere? After a whole year of its absence, was the return everything you hoped it would be? Chat with me in the comments, and make sure you come back to discuss each episode the rest of the season!

Photo courtesy of HBO