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Desperate Housewives Season Six Sneak Peek!

BuzzSugar — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 16:36:23 -0700

The ladies of Wisteria Lane will be back in our living rooms when Desperate Housewives returns on Sunday. There was a lot of drama last season, from Edie's death to Lynette's pregnancy to Gaby's new houseguest, and I can't wait for it to continue. Want a taste of what we can expect? Check out new photos from the upcoming season, including a big spoiler about who Mike ends up marrying.
Photos copyright 2009 ABC, Inc.

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Desperate Housewives Rundown Episode 10, "A Vision's Just a Vision"

BuzzSugar — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 09:46:47 -0800

The voiceover narration by Mary Alice for this week's episode of Desperate Housewives talks about the theme of people living in darkness, though I think there's another theme here, having to do with the women of Wisteria Lane protecting their families. Gaby protected Carlos from discovering how bad things had gotten for them financially, Lynette is beside herself with figuring out how to protect Porter, and Bree tries to protect Andrew from getting hurt by his partner. And Susan. . . OK the theme doesn't extend as much to her, but three out of four ain't bad.

To chat about this episode, read more.

Susan - Now that Katherine and Mike are openly dating, they've decided to introduce MJ to Katherine and try to make them bond. This doesn't go so well, as MJ seems resistant to Katherine overall. Susan tries to help by tagging along with Katherine, Mike and MJ to the bowling alley, but when MJ spots Mike briefly holding Susan's hand, he drops a bowling ball on her foot (the later mention of Katherine's "psychadelic toenail" really skeeved me out!). He tells his parents that he doesn't want Katherine around because Susan and Mike are supposed to be together (did MJ have this issue with Jackson? I don't remember it if he did). Apparently, Susan told MJ once that Mike would come back, and when she says this to Mike, she asks him if he ever thinks about it. Mike leaves without answering her question.

Bree - Awww - Andrew's getting married! I seriously cannot wait to see Bree go into hyper overdrive with planning this wedding. It's like that's what she was born to do. And I think it shows some growth that Bree is so eager to prove how A-OK she is with her son being gay and marrying a man (well, especially since he's a doctor). What she is not OK with is the fact that Andrew's husband-to-be was in an adult film years ago. She thinks Andrew has a right to know and she worries that Alex hasn't been upfront with Andrew about his past. She ultimately finds out that Alex has told Andrew about the movie, and that Andrew accepts this because his past isn't exactly pristine either. Andrew is touched that his mother is trying so hard to be involved in his love life. I can't wait until Bree meets the future in-laws!

Gaby - Carlos has regained his sight for real, which is great! Except for the fact that Gaby has sold a baseball signed by Lou Gehrig that has been in Carlos's family for generations. She figured he would never find out because he was blind, but now, of course, he knows. Gaby tries to explain that she was just trying to make ends meet for the family, but Carlos wants her to get the baseball back anyway. This requires dancing on a table for a wealthy Italian man. By the time Gaby has gotten the baseball back, however, Carlos has realized that Gaby made many sacrifices herself while trying to keep the family afloat, and Carlos he up selling the baseball all over again in order to buy Gaby a pretty dress. Yet again, I must admit that the Gaby-Carlos storyline is actually really moving this week. They may have become my favorite duo.

Lynette - Wow, it's just one thing after another in the Scavo household these days. Porter sneaked into Edie's house to steal her gun (what?) and he thinks that because he was doing that while the club was being set on fire, he's proven innocent of setting the club on fire. Lynette reminds him that because nobody actually saw him during that time, he hasn't proven anything and has, in fact, merely confessed to another crime. Ha! Lynette ends up getting the gun back to Edie's house (in her top drawer? How does everyone know where Edie keeps her gun?!) and she and Tom are set to go to court with Porter. Unfortunately, Porter has decided to run away and he sends Preston to appear in court to pretend to be him. These Scavos are just sinking deeper and deeper into dangerous ground. And was anyone else a little uncomfortable by Tom whining that he would do anything to have sex with a 17-year-old?!

Dave - So, the big reveal that wasn't big at all because everyone saw it coming: Dave wants Mike to pay for having killed Lila and Paige Dash, presumably (from the remarkable head of hair on the kid) his wife and daughter. I actually felt a little sympathetic toward Dave in this episode. He's clearly haunted by these people he lost, and it's obviously agonizing.

To find out how to get all the fashion from Desperate Housewives, check out our new site, CelebStyle!

Desperate Housewives Rundown Episode 9: "Me and My Town"

BuzzSugar — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 09:31:31 -0800

While I thought this week's episode of Desperate Housewives is pretty good, I really missed the recent guest stars (Frances Conroy as the wealthy Virginia Hildebrand and Lily Tomlin as Mrs. McCluskey's sister Roberta)! But overall this episode - all about the immediate aftermath of the fire at the club where Blue Odyssey was playing their first show - is better than most of them, in my opinion. Nothing too ridiculous happens (not even, surprisingly, in Susan's storyline), and there are even a few truly sweet moments (like Carlos's little speech to Gaby about why he married her). Ready to chat about "Me and My Town"? Just read more.

Susan - First off, Susan chews up some cookie and then spits it into her hand and just holds it there while talking to Mike about which one of her friends he's dating, before slapping it in his hand and leaving. Gross! Anyway, Susan first jumps to the conclusion that Mike is dating her friend Lisa, who "always wore something booby" when she had them over. But then Susan eats another one of Katherine's cookies and figures out she's the one who's dating Mike. She leaves in a huff while Katherine babbles behind her, letting it slip that Bree has known for weeks. So, Susan goes over to yell at Bree and, thankfully, Bree calls her out on her anger: "You're not mad at me, or Mike, or Katherine, you're mad at yourself for letting your marriage fall apart." Susan later calls Katherine to say she's OK with her dating Mike - which is kind of nice, really, since she so obviously is not OK with Katherine dating Mike.

Bree - On the night of the fire, Orson broke his nose and now he snores loudly, preventing Bree from sleeping. She takes a sleeping pill one night and wakes up late for her cooking demonstration at the mall. She then gulps down some leftover tea in which Orson had previously dissolved a sleeping pill for Bree, so she's something of a nutcase when she goes to do her demonstration. She says her cookbook is all about mothers and daughters cooking, and she'd cook with her own daughter except that she "grew up and stole my baby." Ha! Eventually, Bree makes Orson get the surgery to alleviate his snoring because, as she explains to the doctor, the power in their relationship has shifted to her and Orson "owes" her one. As soon as they leave, the doctor calls his lover to say, "Tell me we'll never grow into one of those insane couples that just lives to make each other crazy." Turns out, he just moved in with this lover - and it's Andrew Van De Camp!

Lynette - Porter is one of the top arson suspects, and Lynette lies to the detectives so as not to further incriminate her son. Lynette then goes to see Anne, hands her a big envelope of cash and later drives her to the bus station so she'll disappear from their lives. Of course, as Anne's leaving she tells Lynette she was never pregnant with Porter's baby. We all saw this coming a mile away, but it's still sad and an awful thing to do. Lynette has a heart-to-heart with Porter about honesty in their relationship and he tells her he didn't start the fire. Then, when he asks her if she knows where Anne is, Lynette says she doesn't. While that may be technically true (she may not know where Anne went on the bus), it's still not quite as honest as she seems to want Porter to be with her.

Gaby - Carlos might get his sight back! (We all saw this coming a mile away, too.) Now Gaby's freaking out that Carlos will find her unattractive when he regains his sight. You know, I'm all for honesty among friends but it just seems mean of Edie to tell Gaby she's "fat" (and for Susan to agree - or pretend to agree? - just so Gaby doesn't think Susan's lying to her). It's especially annoying because Gaby's not fat! At any rate, Gaby later tells her kids they're responsible for making her fat (just handing down some guilt complexes there), and that Juanita is sassy! (Re: Macaroni and cheese: "It comes in a box, it's not that hard.") In the end, Gaby reveals to Carlos that she's afraid he'll notice she's "lost her luster," but Carlos just chuckles and goes into this long, very adorable speech about the fact that his proposing to Gaby had to do with her laugh, not her looks. I'll admit it, I was pretty smitten by that little speech.

Edie and Dave - Edie always thought Porter was trouble, ever since he was six years old, and she's apparently a "really good judge of character." Hilariously, she says this as she sits next to Dave, her psychopathic husband. In the end, Dave goes to the detectives and tells them he saw Porter coming out of the club, providing further proof that Porter might have started the fire.

I'm really excited for next week's episode! Andrew's getting married?! And Porter's alibi for the night of the fire is Edie? (Tom's line is funny: "Tell me you're not having sex with her, too!") And Katherine starts trying to bond with MJ.

To find out how to get all the fashion from Desperate Housewives, check out our new site, CelebStyle!

Desperate Housewives Rundown Episode Eight: "City on Fire"

BuzzSugar — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 09:30:12 -0800

As the title suggests, in this episode of Desperate Housewives the town of Fairview becomes a "city on fire." It starts out with a fire at the club where the Wisteria Lane boy band Blue Odyssey is performing. Then we travel back in time to the day before and as we learn about the various storylines, did you notice that each scene in that first part of the episode begins with some kind of fire (Susan sitting by her fireplace, Katherine making crème brûlée with that torch thingy, Anne's husband striking a match, etc.)?

Anyway, we get further proof that Dave's a sicko, Julie returns to Wisteria Lane for a visit with Susan and the plot thickens in Porter Scavo's dramatic love life. To chat about it all, read more.

Susan - Yay, Julie's back! But ewww, it's so weird to see her dating that older, thrice-married guy, Lloyd. Susan is pretty wary of this guy and this worsens considerably when she learns that Lloyd plans to propose to Julie. So, in her ridiculous, histrionic way, Susan tries to botch Lloyd's proposal at the club, but it turns out she didn't need to worry about Julie wanting to get married - ever. Julie tells Susan she doesn't want to get married after watching her crazy mother's history with men and marriage. Susan tries to convince Julie otherwise, though to be honest, I think it makes perfect sense that Julie would have those beliefs (and if they help stop her from marrying creepy Lloyd, all the better).

Bree - Funny gal Rachel Harris guest stars as a reporter trying to expose the dirty truths behind the "perfect" image Bree puts forth in her cookbook. Bree almost succeeds in making her life seem spotless in every way - until Orson's new parole officer leaves a message on the machine for all to hear (and Andrew asks, "Now can I be gay?"). From there, Sandra the reporter only needs to dig a little around Wisteria Lane to uncover all sorts of interesting tidbits for her story (and for the other neighbors, some of whom are giddy to know that Bree was once a "booze hound"). In the end, Sandra says she thinks Bree sets up impossible standards for women with her cookbook, but Bree explains she's so imperfect that sometimes it's nice to do just one thing right, even if it's just a casserole.

Gaby - Virginia's back! After her blowout with Gaby in the last episode, Virginia returns to the Solis home and informs them that they will be the sole recipients of her massive fortune when she dies. Gaby is reluctant at first, but of course she can't resist a massive fortune. The night of the Battle of the Bands, Virginia shows up with a limousine and insists Gaby go with her. Virginia's desperation is meant to make her seem like a loon, I think, but it mostly just breaks my heart. At the club, Virginia tells Gaby she's enrolling the girls in a fancy school an hour away, and Gaby gets another opportunity to tell off Virginia, once again ensuring that the Solises will see none of Virginia's money. This doesn't change when Gaby helps Virginia exit safely from the burning club.

Lynette - Lynette pays a visit to Anne and calls her "sick" for getting it on with Porter. Anne merely replies that she's glad she's carrying Porter's baby, which is right when Anne's husband walks in. Lynette leaves the house, but then turns back in time to see Anne's husband kicking her. Lynette saves Anne and gets her to the hospital. That night at the Battle of the Bands, Porter hunts down Anne's husband and starts a fight with him. Porter and Lynette leave the club, but later we see that he's obtained a gun, somehow. And now Anne's husband thinks Porter started the fire at the club which, we find out in the previews for the next episode, killed six people.

Dave, Mrs. McCluskey, etc. - Dave's psychiatrist tracks him down at the band's show and confronts him about his move to Fairview. Dave does his best to play innocent but when Dr. Heller asks to speak with Mike, Dave leads Dr. Heller to a storage closet (which he doesn't seem to think is odd at all), strangles him and sets the place on fire. Then, Dave saves Mike from the burning club because he's "not done with him" yet.

To find out how to get all the fashion from last night's episode, check out our new site, CelebStyle!

Desperate Housewives Rundown Episode Seven: "What More Do I Need?"

BuzzSugar — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 09:42:33 -0800

"Desire. It's an emotion designed to lead us astray." This week's episode of Desperate Housewives deals with an element that can be found in pretty much every single soapy episode: Desire. I really enjoyed this one - there was so much drama! My favorite storyline is Bree's but the twist with Lynette's son Porter is definitely the most shocking.

Did you watch last night? Ready to chat about it? Just read more.

Susan - I really love these episodes when Susan's storyline is more or less normal-ish, when she's neither doing insanely stupid things nor is there "high drama" in her life. Susan and Jackson "start anew" with their relationship, going on a second first date, then a second second date, and so on. Susan insists that they "get to know each other" for the first three dates before having sex on the fourth. Jackson resists at first and attempts to seduce Susan (though, seriously, has anyone used that saxophoney jazz lite "sex music," as Susan puts it, since 1987 or so?), to no avail. He then discovers that his sexual frustration somehow unblocks whatever it was that was preventing him from painting artistically, and then, of course, he doesn't want to have sex. In the end, Susan sees a painting of herself and she is convinced that Jackson really does "know" her. Then she poses nude for him so he can accurately paint her hands.

Bree - Oooh, this storyline is so juicy! Bree and Orson's employee is caught stealing money from them and is fired. Soon after, Bree reads a review of her cookbook in a Christian magazine that gives her book "four halos!" and giddily she and Orson end up getting it on in the kitchen. The next day, Andrew tells them that their former employee stole the footage from the surveillance camera so they wouldn't have any evidence of him stealing the money. Problem is, that footage also includes a couple getting it on in the kitchen! But when Andrew retrieves the video and they all watch it, they learn that the couple on the tape isn't Bree and Orson - it's Katherine and Mike. Bree brings the video to Katherine and chastises her for dating Susan's ex-husband because "we're women! We don't do that to each other." But Katherine's radiantly happy face says it all - she's not giving Mike up just yet.

Gaby - Lonely old Virginia Hildebrand (Frances Conroy) continues to pursue the Solis family in this episode, having them over for an entire weekend and crawling in bed with them to watch Surf's Up ("My heavens, is that penguin surfing?!"). This scene cracked me up. Her giddy laughter is just so childlike and funny. Everything turns not-so-funny, however, when she tells Gaby she's making up a room in her home just for the girls and that she'll send a car for them anytime they want to spend time with "Grandma," as Virginia insists they call her. Finally, when Virginia shows up uninvited to Celia's birthday party so Celia can go with her to pick out an antique doll (which, I'm guessing, would have been a very creepy scene; old dolls frighten me!), Gaby yells at her to stop obsessing over her family. Hurt, Virginia calls the country club where Carlos works and claims that Carlos touched her inappropriately during a massage. My heart just breaks for Carlos these days.

Lynette - OMG, you guys, Porter's a baby daddy! OK, I just had to get that out because it's crazy! I thought Lynette's storyline was going to be sort of funny at first, when she finds out about Porter's affair with Kirby's mom. But then she slams Anne against a wall and slaps her! Not funny anymore. She demands that Porter call things off, but he doesn't want to, and he doesn't want Anne's abusive husband to find out about the affair. Then the big surprise: Anne's pregnant. In the end, we see Porter making arrangements with Anne to leave, and Porter gently thanks his mom for everything she and Tom have done for him. Isn't Porter a twin? Where is that other kid? I would be very curious to get his perspective on all this.

Edie, Dave, Mrs McCluskey - Hooray for more Lily Tomlin! As Mrs. McCluskey's sister Roberta, she does some detective work with Dave's phone records and finds out that every month he calls a psychiatrist - a psychiatrist to the criminally insane. In the end, we see the psychiatrist getting a flight to Fairview, presumably to track down Dave (or whatever his real name is).

To find out how to get all the fashion from last night's episode, check out our new site, CelebStyle!

Desperate Housewives Rundown Episode Six, "There's Always a Woman"

BuzzSugar — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 09:48:38 -0800

Lily Tomlin! Frances Conroy! Hooray for some great new blood on Desperate Housewives! Overall I think this week's episode is better than the others have been thus far this season, but in particular, it's so awesome to see these new ladies reinvigorating the show. Tomlin plays Mrs. McCluskey's saucy, smart-talking sister while Frances Conroy (known to Six Feet Under fans as Ruth Fisher) is a massage client of Carlos's who has a very, ah, "special" relationship with him.

The theme, of course, is "dangerous women." To chat about the goings-on in this episode, read more.

Susan - OK, I'll admit, I think the beginning is really funny with Susan blabbing on and on about Jackson to her new painter, an older man who calls her Suzanne by mistake. Of course, in real life, Susan would be insanely annoying, but this scene made me chuckle. After basically telling Jackson she doesn't see a future with him, Susan's now having second thoughts and she goes to Jackson's apartment to talk. Hearing the shower running, she decides to undress and climb in to surprise him. Sigh. If TV's taught me anything it's that the person showering is rarely who you think it is. Susan hasn't been watching the same shows, though, and she comes upon a woman Jackson picked up at a club. The two exchange insults, Jackson returns to the apartment, Susan yells at him and leaves in a huff. Later, Jackson goes to Susan's and eventually they decide to "start over."

Bree - Poor Katherine! She has a good point: When she and Bree started the business together, they were two lonely women, doing something for themselves. Now Bree has all this success and is one half of a "power couple" with Orson. So, Bree plays matchmaker and sets up Katherine with Peter, a man Orson says is an old college friend. Who else saw the fact that Peter was really a fellow inmate coming a mile away? What I did not see coming, however, is Peter's history of stealing organs. Gross. Katherine looks so happy after her evening with Peter! But Bree breaks the news to her about Peter's past and Katherine breaks things off. In the end, though, it looks like there might be something promising happening between Katherine and Mike. . .

Gaby - I loved this storyline! Carlos inadvertently helps one of his older clients, Virginia Hildebrand (Frances Conroy) have a "happy ending," so to speak, and she tips him very generously. He's done such "wonders" for Virginia, she wants to pay Carlos an extravagant amount to be her personal masseur when she goes to Europe. Gaby, once she finds out about Virginia's happy massages, rejects this idea. . . until Virginia offers to bring Gaby and the girls along and asks if Gaby would like to be her personal shopper. As long as she "doesn't mind being paid in dresses," that is. Of course, this is an offer Gaby can't refuse!

Lynette - Lynette comes upon Tom chatting with an attractive woman (the first "dangerous woman" we learn about in the show) and immediately assumes that Tom is having an affair with her. Turns out, this woman is Anne Shilling, real estate agent and mother to Kirby, a friend of Porter's. She helps Tom find a rehearsal space for the band, but Lynette's suspicion is raised once again when Anne drops by the space to hand off some old furniture - including a futon. When Lynette confronts Tom about this, he assures her that he would never hurt her by having an affair. He spots a condom wrapper on the floor and soon discovers that Porter is actually using the rehearsal space as his own personal love lair. What Tom doesn't know: Porter's lady is actually Anne Shilling! Yikes. Lynette follows Tom to the rehearsal space and spots a messily dressed Anne hurrying out the door. She now thinks her suspicions have been confirmed about Tom and Anne, we last see Lynette angrily packing a suitcase.

Edie, Dave and Mrs. McCluskey - Mrs. McCluskey pretends to be just a frail, sweet little old lady when Edie comes to visit her in the hospital, when in fact, she's recruiting her brassy, sassy sister Roberta (Lily Tomlin) to help her investigate Dave some more. I can't wait to see more of the snooping sisters - they are so fabulous! Later we learn that Dave had a drug addict brother named Steve who was killed in prison by a fellow inmate.

To find out how to get all the fashion from last night's episode, check out our new site, CelebStyle!

Desperate Housewives Rundown Episode Five: "Mirror, Mirror"

BuzzSugar — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 09:33:29 -0700

I really enjoyed the format of this week's episode of Desperate Housewives, how about you? It hit the ground running with each of the various couples engaged in its own tense moment, topped off by Mrs. McCluskey walking into her birthday party wielding a baseball bat! Throughout the episode we learn all about what we missed over the past five years.

What did you think of this episode? To chat about it, read more.

Susan - After her painful divorce with Mike (and I have to say it was awfully sad to see Susan pleading with Mike to try again before he signs the papers and leaves), Susan just wanted a no-strings-attached kind of relationship, and at first she found that with her hunky painter, Jackson. But now in the five-years-in-the future (or, present-day, for them), Jackson wants to move in with Susan and she isn't ready for that. So, Jackson challenges her: If he dated another woman, Susan wouldn't care? Susan tells him she would not. In the end, Jackson realizes that he and Susan don't have a future together, and he leaves.

Bree - Poor Bree! She's reluctant to make Orson partner because she feels she owes Katherine for having helped Bree through her struggle with alcoholism when Orson went to jail years ago. Orson, not understanding why Bree is so resistant to making him partner, takes it personally and eventually tells her he wants a divorce. Only then does Bree admit the truth about how Katherine helped her. So, Orson tells Katherine he'll work for them and will become partner only once Katherine thinks he's earned it. I look forward to seeing how Orson and Bree will be able to work together!

Lynette - Ugh. Again Tom is acting like a petulant child and blaming Lynette for everything wrong in his life. I honestly can't stand this guy. If he could just not whine for one episode I'd be happy. A few years back, Tom was electrocuted and thought he was going to die - hence the mid-life crisis life-is-short attitude and the purchase of the beautiful red convertible. Now, Tom wants to sell the pizza place and travel around in an RV. He even accepted an offer on the pizza place without talking to Lynette first, and then when Lynette objects to all this, he pouts and basically calls her a nag for ruining everything fun in his life. I am so done with you, Tom Scavo.

Gaby - I'm glad that they finally acknowledged that Gaby was told at one time that she couldn't have kids and now she has two. Or, two miracles, as Carlos puts it. Now we learn that Carlos never got a vasectomy after their second child, as Gaby asked him to do. So, they've been having unprotected sex in Carlos's hopes that they will conceive again. Honestly? What is Carlos's deal? Remember the first season when he messed with Gaby's birth control pills so she wouldn't be protected? He's got a weird problem with trying to force his wife to get pregnant - without her knowing about it.

Edie and Dave - For some reason, Dave riding around on that bicycle all the time makes him even creepier than your average creepy dude. Dave convinces Edie to throw a surprise party for Mrs. McCluskey's 70th birthday, and then he breaks into McCluskey's house and rearranges a few things in her home to confuse her and make her seem senile. McCluskey knows it was Dave who did this, however, and she enters her birthday party in a rage, wielding a bat meant for Dave's head. Of course, this is all according to Dave's plan to make McCluskey appear off her rocker, and she's driven away in an ambulance. So sad!

To find out how to get all the fashion from last night's episode, check out our new site, CelebStyle!

Desperate Housewives Rundown Episode Four: "Back in Business"

BuzzSugar — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 09:34:06 -0700

Ah, jealousy. Even your closest friends harbor jealousy toward you when you are successful, according to this week's episode of Desperate Housewives. As Bree's book is about to hit shelves, there seems to be a ripple effect of jealousy and resentment hitting all of her friends - and even Orson. But as the voice of Mary Alice soothes at the end, the way to deal with so much jealousy is to "simply share what you have."

To chat about this week's episode, read more.

Susan - I have written in my notes from last night, "Susan = mentally deficient??" Who on earth would instruct her kid to purposely fall off his bike just so his dad's feelings aren't hurt? When Mike realizes that MJ is starting to regard Jackson as a father figure, Mike feels threatened and buys MJ a bicycle, saying he'll teach MJ how to ride it the following week. Of course, as Susan points out (and as she maybe should have pointed out in the first place?), you can't give a five-year-old a bicycle and tell him not to learn how to ride it. So, MJ begs Jackson to teach him, and when Susan finds out, she instructs MJ to purposely fall off the bike when Mike comes over so Mike can feel like he's really helping MJ learn how to ride. This causes MJ to injure his arm (nice going, Mom!) and Susan and Mike have a frank conversation about the realities of parenting as a divorced couple. Then, in the end, Mike moves into Mary Alice's old house on Wisteria Lane, so now I guess he can watch Jackson parent his kid up close.

Bree - Bree's having a time of great career success: her book is about to be published and she has been named Businesswoman of the Year by the Chamber of Commerce. However, sensing resentment from her friends, she downplays it all (that scene with her finding out about the Businesswoman of the Year made me mad; I hate it when women downplay their accomplishments just to make other people feel more comfortable). Meanwhile, Orson is trying to find a new job and when he suggests to Bree that he become her business partner, Katherine makes it clear that she will leave if Orson comes on board. Stuck between a rock and a hard place, Bree turns Orson down. Later Bree confides in Lynette that "there is nothing successful about me!" And she wonders if all the success is worth it if her friends are jealous, Katherine is resentful, and Orson is sleeping in the guest bedroom after feeling snubbed by his wife. In the end, Bree gets a loyal pep talk from Lynette and decides to bring Orson on as her partner. I really liked that this episode ended on that sweet note: Orson opening up the box with the chef's hat inside and climbing back in bed next to Bree.

Lynette - Lynette, in fact, is quite jealous of Bree and she decides to try and rework the marketing strategy in place for Bree's book. But when Bree rejects Lynette's ideas and decides to stay with the original marketing plan (which was cooked up by Lynette's former assistant - who now has his own company), Lynette drinks herself silly and makes a big scene just before Bree is named Businesswoman of the Year. Later Lynette goes to Bree and they talk it out: Bree is conflicted about her own success, Lynette is envious of Bree's success but vows to stand by her.

Gaby - Gaby decides that she and Carlos need to get Juanita invited to a weekly play date so she and Carlos can have some time alone to have sex. But then Juanita witnesses them "wrestling" (which, disturbingly, Gaby allows Juanita to think is something during which Daddy hurts Mommy?) and tells all the kids at the play date all about the facts of life. So, no more play dates - in any capacity - for any of the Solises.

Edie - Honestly, sometimes when Dave's face is on the screen, I have to look away. He just gives me the heebie-jeebies. We're getting closer and closer to understanding his deal: he lashes out at Edie one day when he apparently hasn't taken his meds. Later he tries to make it up to her by buying Mary Alice's old house, which Edie somehow decided they should buy and rent out. Of course, Dave is not someone with very pure motives, and he bought the house mostly so he could lure Mike back to Wisteria Lane, as he clearly seems to be zeroing in on Mike as his target for. . . something.

Next week we're promised all sorts of salacious details about the five years we haven't seen. I look forward to some answers in that regard, how about you?

To find out how to get all the fashion from last night's episode, check out our new site, CelebStyle!

Desperate Housewives Rundown Episode Three, "Kids Ain't Like Everyone Else"

BuzzSugar — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 09:38:05 -0700

Here's what I liked best about this week's episode of Desperate Housewives: the faceoff between fellow housewives Gaby and Susan! It's good to shake things up a bit and have the housewives literally at each other's throats. I do think that if that fight were real, Gaby would win for sure. Low center of gravity and all that. Anyway, the theme of the episode was obviously "bullies," and each storyline fell into the theme in one way or another.

To chat about the episode, read more.

Susan - Poor little MJ (who is, in my opinion, one of the most adorable kids on TV) is being bullied by a girl, and not just any girl - Juanita Solis. When Mike refuses to teach MJ how to fight (because if it wears a skirt, apparently, you can't fight it), Susan is annoyed and declares that "if feminism means anything it's that it's OK for a big mean girl to get her butt kicked." Um . . . yeah. Sure. So, she takes matters into her own hands - literally - and shoves Juanita to the ground (does it make me a bad person that I thought this part was really, really funny?). Of course, Gaby rushes over and she and Susan throw down over their kids' throwdowns. Later the two make up and toast each other for being such good moms.

Bree - So Danielle's grown up to be a hippie-esque, home-schoolin' vegetarian. Interesting. Of course, Bree is conflicted because while she's happy to see her grandson Benjamin again, she can't deal with the way Danielle is raising him. Nobody rocks a horrified expression quite like Bree, and this episode allowed her to do so often. Unable to change her daughter's mind about raising Benjamin as a vegetarian, she devilishly sneaks the boy a hot dog (well, two, actually) which he later regurgitates right in front of Bree's entire dinner party (is it me, or is it really odd that Bree's dinner guests include Mrs. McCluskey, Edie. and Dave, but not one of the three original housewives?). Danielle and her husband take Benjamin and leave in a huff, after which Orson accuses Bree of not trying hard enough to keep Benjamin.

Lynette - In the past few episodes, it's seemed that when they try to give Lynette a storyline that doesn't include huge crises, it just comes out lame. Tom starts playing bass in the garage with creepy Dave on drums, and Lynette has a major problem with this . . . why? I didn't quite get that. Anyway, the woman sets it up so that Tom will run over his own guitar (I'm not even a musician but that scene made even my soul die a little - you don't just run over a guitar like that!). But then Dave comes by with a brand new bass, which he tells Lynette to give to Tom and thank her lucky stars that her husband's mid-life crisis isn't more destructive. It's a good thing she gives the guitar to Tom outside on the front porch so Dave could see the exchange as he cycles by the house. Sheesh.

Gaby - Poor Gaby. Navigating the trials and tribulations of motherhood while also becoming accustomed to a less fancy lifestyle is intensely difficult for her. She and Carlos sell their beautiful car and then Gaby buys Andrew Van de Camp's old, beat-up vehicle, only to find out the car needs a new radiator - which Andrew refuses to pay for. Meanwhile, turns out Gaby's larger-than-average daughter Juanita (who, according to Susan, "could take down a small deer") has been bullying Susan's son MJ. After Gaby and Susan trade insults over each other's kids, they end up wrestling on the lawn before making up over a pitcher of screwdrivers. Susan suggests that Gaby should "get mad more often," so Gaby later threatens to run her car into Andrew's shiny new one unless he ponies up the money for the new radiator. I loved this little moment of triumph for Gaby.

Edie - Well, Dave just keeps getting weirder and creepier, doesn't he? As McCluskey goes sniffing around Dave's past, he starts to seem shadier to everyone, and even Edie is confused as to why she doesn't know any details about her own husband's past - including where he went to college! When Mrs. McCluskey and Katherine successfully manage to raise Edie's suspicions enough that she asks Dave where he went to school in front of everybody, he shuts her down with a story about how he never went to college and is embarrassed about that. Basically, Edie's now guilted into not asking any more questions, and Dave plants the seed in her mind that Mrs. McCluskey is becoming senile.

More drama to come, obvs. What did you think of this episode?

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Desperate Housewives Rundown: Episode Two, "We're So Happy You're So Happy"

BuzzSugar — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 09:37:27 -0700

I'm really glad we got some more Orson on this week's Desperate Housewives because otherwise I would have been pretty fed up with it. In general the writing on this show isn't exactly award-worthy, but this episode is pretty ridiculous. Also, I think I need more Katherine in my life. There were some things that made the episode worthwhile, though (including Carlos's sweet line, "We have lost nothing that matters. I've never been happier in my life."), so to chat about it all, read more.

Susan - Ugh, ugh, ugh. Susan's storyline annoys me to no end. Mike runs into Jackson at Susan's house and declares that he's going to hang out with Jackson, one-on-one, to make sure Jackson's OK to be around Mike and Susan's son (did you notice that they have gotten around actually calling the kid "Maynerd" by nicknaming him "MJ"?). First off, this strikes me as preposterous (what's wrong with all three of them hanging out?), but more so is the fact that apparently Susan has no say in the matter, even though she clearly doesn't like the idea. Why does Mike get to make this decision? And then, when the two men hang out, Mike tells Jackson about Susan's "secret" turn-on (also, since when is nibbling on an ear a "secret" turn-on?), so Susan really forbids them from hanging out again. Mike obviously doesn't trust her to take good care of their son or choose good men. This seems like a problem. Finally, Susan's other ex-husband, Karl, is dragged back onto the show just to make one more Jackson-meets-another-one-of-Susan's-exes joke. Oy.

Bree - I found the Bree-Orson story most compelling, partially because I sympathized with Orson, but also because he's just such a funny and great character. Theirs is an age-old problem of one spouse (Bree) neglecting the other (Orson) because she is focused almost entirely on her career. But in this case, the issue of Orson's jail time comes up, and Orson thinks Bree feels ashamed of his prison record when he only did it because she gave him an ultimatum. I think that Bree's line about being terrified of failing is interesting. This is really what's behind her need to be perfect all the time.

Lynette - Lynette creates an account with a fake screen name on a Facebook-type social networking site so she can fool her teenage son into telling her things about his life. Her alter-ego and Porter become online buddies. . . but then Porter develops feelings for this mysterious girl. . . who is actually his mother. OK. Sure. Fine. Oedipus for the technological era. Icky, but I get it. But when she emails him to "cut things off," would she really sign it "Love, Mom"? And of course, she has now created even more trust issues with the kid. At least this week Lynette's story doesn't involve life-threatening diseases or Tom berating her, but come on. This is almost Susan-level dumb.

Gaby - So, Gaby and Carlos are strapped for cash and Carlos takes a job as a masseuse to rich folks at a country club. Just when Gaby's excited to actually be invited to one of the season's biggest social events, she and Carlos are officially "disinvited" because the party is at the country club where Carlos works and the other guests would not feel comfortable mingling with "the staff." Of course, Gaby insists on going anyway because she wants to feel wealthy and important again, but they get kicked out and Carlos explains to her that being rich doesn't make anyone happy. You know, I understand that Gaby doesn't have the money for a new dress, but surely she has some makeup leftover from her old days? I know that the point is that she's now frumpy and everything, but how frumpy do they have to make her? No makeup at all to a formal event? Sheesh.

Edie - This Dave character is one of the creepiest-looking dudes ever. Clearly, he's up to no good and has a master plan for someone on Wisteria Lane. I'm a little surprised that Edie ever agreed to move back to the Lane in the first place - she must have known she'd hate it. Anyway, when Mrs. McCluskey makes a crack about Edie's boobs (best line of the night from Mrs. McC: "I say she's easier to get into than community college, she says my face looks like a knee. It's fun!"), Edie decides they must move. Dave can't have that, so he pays Mrs. McCluskey a visit and ultimately frightens her into apologizing to Edie, which she does. Now Mrs. McC is super suspicious of Dave, and it looks like she's going to go digging into his past next week.