The Office Rundown: Episode 6, "Branch Wars"

The Office Rundown: Episode 6, "Branch Wars"

Karen's back! At least for this week's episode of The Office, Karen makes a return appearance, and she's clearly not over Jim yet. Also, she extends an offer to Stanley to join her sales team at the Utica office. When Stanley tells Michael about this, Michael, Dwight and Jim go on a mission to send the message to Karen that if she "poaches" Stanley, the will "burn Utica to the ground."


Yet another solid, classic half-hour of Office goodness. Check out the lines and moments I loved most this week:

  • Michael rigs a Ferris Bueller’s Day Off-style dummy that activates a tape with a snoring sound to make it look like Michael's sleeping at his desk.
    Stanley: "I don’t understand why sleeping at your desk is better than you not being here."
  • Michael: “You can’t take the funny black guy from the office! ... I don’t know how George Bush did it when Colin Powell left."
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  • Pam: “Oscar, Toby and I are founding members of the Finer Things Club.”
    Oscar: “Besides having sex with men, I would say that the Finer Things Club is the gayest thing about me.”
  • Salesperson from Utica when Michael calls to offer him a position: “Didn’t everyone from Scranton quit, like immediately?”
    Michael: “No, I fired them, and you’re next. So… what do you say?”
  • During the car ride to the Utica branch, Dwight pees in an empty can. “I think I cut my penis on the lip!”

  • Andy: ”The Finer Things Club is the most exclusive club in this office. Naturally it’s where I need to be. The Party Planning Committee is my backup and Kevin’s band is my safety.”
  • There is a sign that reads "Finer Things Club in Progress, please be respectful," with a picture of the Munch painting "The Scream" and a red slash through it.
  • Dwight: “The eyes are the groin of the head.”
  • Jim: “Karen’s back.”
    Michael, over the walkie-talkie: "Take her to a hotel, make love to her. Do it Jim, just climb on top of her and think about Stanley."
  • Karen: "I cried for weeks over that guy, so yeah, seeing him climb out of a PT Cruiser in a ladies warehouse uniform? Felt pretty good."
  • The interaction between Karen and Jim at the end is so painful and awkward!
    Karen: “Thank you so much for coming to Utica and breaking my copier and telling me how well things are going in your relationship."
  • Michael asks Pam to help him with a want ad. "Wanted: Middle-aged black man with sass. Big butt. Bigger heart."
  • Stanley: "How on earth did Micahel call my bluff? Is he some kind of secret genius?" He chuckles. "Sometimes I say crazy things."
  • Jim joins the Finer Things Club and they get ready to discuss Angela's Ashes. Toby: "Who was the main character?"
    Jim: “Angela... No. Ashes.”
    Pam mouths “sorry” to Oscar.

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