In this week's "The Office," Phyllis and Bob Vance got married and everyone was invited. Michael got a second chance at being in a wedding, when Phyllis asked him to push her father's wheelchair down the aisle, but he still managed to make things awkward. Meanwhile, the Pam-Jim-Karen saga continued. Check out my highlights from the episode below.
- Michael: "It's a big day for Phyllis, but it's an even bigger day for me. Employer of the bride!" He adds that since he's the one who pays Phyllis' salary, "It's like I'm paying for the wedding - which I am happy to do."
- Pam: "Phyllis used the same invitations as Roy and me, so when I got the invitation, I thought I was being invited to my own wedding."
- Dwight: "Hi Angela. You look like the Queen of England."
- Dwight explains that the Shrutes have their own tradition: When getting married, they stand in their own graves. "The funerals are very romantic, but the weddings are a dreary affair."
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- When Phyllis' father gets up from the wheelchair to walk her down the aisle, Michael turns to the camera and says, "This is bullshit."
Later, he says that pushing Phyllis' dad down the aisle was supposed to be the highlight of the wedding. "Now, the wedding has no highlight."
- Angela: "Congratulations, Phyllis. You look lovely. Your dress is very white. So white it is burning my eyes."
Phyllis: "Thanks, Angela."
- Michael says that the key to any good speech is in the opening, and if one doesn't work, he'll try a few more:
Michael says he will act as "tour guide" in the story of Phyllis and Bob, which is "one of the great, seemingly impossible love stories of our time."
Michael says the Webster's dictionary definition of wedding is the fusing of two metals with a hot torch. "Phyllis and Bob are two metals. Gold medals."
“You look at her, and she looks kinda matronly today. But back in high school, I swear, her nickname was Easy Rider.”
- Dwight decides to identify wedding crashers and report them to Phyllis, because that way he doesn't have to get her a gift. In his investigation, Dwight kicks out elderly Uncle Al, who has dementia.
- "Dude, get it together. I listened to you for half an hour and most of that stuff went right over my head." — Michael, to Uncle Al
- After Toby's date catches the bridal bouquet, Toby does a celebratory gesture and exclaims, "TOBY!"
- Michael: "They say your wedding goes by in such a flash, you don't even get to eat a piece of your own cake. Well I say that's crazy. I say let them eat cake. Margaret Thatcher said that. About marriage. Smart broad."