"Desire. It's an emotion designed to lead us astray." This week's episode of Desperate Housewives deals with an element that can be found in pretty much every single soapy episode: Desire. I really enjoyed this one — there was so much drama! My favorite storyline is Bree's but the twist with Lynette's son Porter is definitely the most shocking.
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Susan — I really love these episodes when Susan's storyline is more or less normal-ish, when she's neither doing insanely stupid things nor is there "high drama" in her life. Susan and Jackson "start anew" with their relationship, going on a second first date, then a second second date, and so on. Susan insists that they "get to know each other" for the first three dates before having sex on the fourth. Jackson resists at first and attempts to seduce Susan (though, seriously, has anyone used that saxophoney jazz lite "sex music," as Susan puts it, since 1987 or so?), to no avail. He then discovers that his sexual frustration somehow unblocks whatever it was that was preventing him from painting artistically, and then, of course, he doesn't want to have sex. In the end, Susan sees a painting of herself and she is convinced that Jackson really does "know" her. Then she poses nude for him so he can accurately paint her hands.
Bree — Oooh, this storyline is so juicy! Bree and Orson's employee is caught stealing money from them and is fired. Soon after, Bree reads a review of her cookbook in a Christian magazine that gives her book "four halos!" and giddily she and Orson end up getting it on in the kitchen. The next day, Andrew tells them that their former employee stole the footage from the surveillance camera so they wouldn't have any evidence of him stealing the money. Problem is, that footage also includes a couple getting it on in the kitchen! But when Andrew retrieves the video and they all watch it, they learn that the couple on the tape isn't Bree and Orson — it's Katherine and Mike. Bree brings the video to Katherine and chastises her for dating Susan's ex-husband because "we're women! We don't do that to each other." But Katherine's radiantly happy face says it all — she's not giving Mike up just yet.
Gaby — Lonely old Virginia Hildebrand (Frances Conroy) continues to pursue the Solis family in this episode, having them over for an entire weekend and crawling in bed with them to watch Surf's Up ("My heavens, is that penguin surfing?!"). This scene cracked me up. Her giddy laughter is just so childlike and funny. Everything turns not-so-funny, however, when she tells Gaby she's making up a room in her home just for the girls and that she'll send a car for them anytime they want to spend time with "Grandma," as Virginia insists they call her. Finally, when Virginia shows up uninvited to Celia's birthday party so Celia can go with her to pick out an antique doll (which, I'm guessing, would have been a very creepy scene; old dolls frighten me!), Gaby yells at her to stop obsessing over her family. Hurt, Virginia calls the country club where Carlos works and claims that Carlos touched her inappropriately during a massage. My heart just breaks for Carlos these days.
Lynette — OMG, you guys, Porter's a baby daddy! OK, I just had to get that out because it's crazy! I thought Lynette's storyline was going to be sort of funny at first, when she finds out about Porter's affair with Kirby's mom. But then she slams Anne against a wall and slaps her! Not funny anymore. She demands that Porter call things off, but he doesn't want to, and he doesn't want Anne's abusive husband to find out about the affair. Then the big surprise: Anne's pregnant. In the end, we see Porter making arrangements with Anne to leave, and Porter gently thanks his mom for everything she and Tom have done for him. Isn't Porter a twin? Where is that other kid? I would be very curious to get his perspective on all this.
Edie, Dave, Mrs McCluskey — Hooray for more Lily Tomlin! As Mrs. McCluskey's sister Roberta, she does some detective work with Dave's phone records and finds out that every month he calls a psychiatrist — a psychiatrist to the criminally insane. In the end, we see the psychiatrist getting a flight to Fairview, presumably to track down Dave (or whatever his real name is).
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