Every Friday, I round up the week's best, funniest, strangest, and most embarrassing moments in television for your amusement.

• You've seen Jim as Dwight. Now watch Dwight as Jim:

• On this week's "House," Wilson's ex-wife described Wilson as "carefully calibrating his level of protectiveness for your individual needs." House responded: "Did you just compare Wilson to a tampon?"
• Tracy Jordan from "30 Rock," on deciding to come out of hiding:
  

  "I'd rather die famous than live for 100 years like this — sitting on benches, carrying plastic bags, brushing my own teeth!"

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• How boring is "The Bachelor" going to be now that Nicole, Stephanie South Carolina and Kate are gone? They were the only three who ever said anything remotely funny or interesting. Then again, they probably wouldn't have made a good match for Andy, who has yet to say anything remotely funny or interesting, either.




• On an otherwise-somber episode of "The Riches," Ken lightened things up by complaining he was losing at his game of solitaire. When Wayne pointed out that he was playing himself, he responded: "That's why it hurts!"
• On this week's "Scrubs," Janitor pretends to be a ghost to scare the kids in the pediatric ward into not spilling their food on the floor. He justifies it thusly:
  

  "This is the ward with the kids who got their tonsils out — they're spoiled! Eating ice cream all day... You know what I got after I had my tonsils out? Hot coffee and granola. Hot and scratchy. Hot and scratchy!"

• Hilda on "Ugly Betty" nods emphatically to something Betty says, and then explains, "That's my wise hairdresser's nod. They say you gotta do it even when you’re not listening." Sigh. I know that nod too well.
• If you didn't see Jack Black on "American Idol," it's worth a look. The sad thing is, it just might be the best performance of "Kiss from a Rose" ever on "Idol."